Find a Focusing Professional - Alistair McKinnon
Hi! My name is Alistair McKinnon I can still be surprised at the gifts that life brings in different forms. The following is 2 versions of the same play, called “Life”, running in parallel: I was born to a highly-critical mother and a passive and supportive father. I was bullied at school, when I was 26 I experienced both the suicide death of my father and the death of my eldest brother in a car accident. After that year, I went through breakups of my own marriage and subsequent relationships, addictions to sex and spiritual experience, failure in my professional life, and I was periodically swamped with depression, collapse, and loneliness. I was highly critical of myself and thought I was separate and different from others, that I was never enough...and that there must be something wrong with me. Contrastingly, I was born into a very privileged middle-class family and lived in suburban Melbourne. I grew up playing football and cricket in the backyard with two older brothers, and went for holidays at the beach every year. I was privileged to travel to, and live in England as a young boy, receive 4 years of private school education, and be university-qualified. I spent 25 years as a chartered accountant and started my own business. Through this time, I was in a ‘successful’ 27-year relationship, and raised two beautiful children (now young adults, becoming successful at what they do). I owned a Federation cottage in Canterbury in Melbourne, Australia, and embarked on an intense and enriching spiritual journey over 14 years. I later owned a small farm outside of Melbourne (with cows, goats, sheep, geese, chickens, a rabbit, a horse, and a dog and cat) where the children could explore to their heart's content. When my marriage failed I moved to Byron Bay to live and work and explore conscious relationship. It’s no wonder that over 25 years ago, I started trying to make sense of it all. There was much to appreciate and much to suffer with… and a sense of confusion when often, both were here. Now, with the wisdom that comes with age, many years of exploration of the truth and with the help of Focusing, I can see that life has played its hand this way and it has been inviting me into a deeper connection to itself – to see the beauty, love and blessing, present in it all – in both the positive and the negative. In 2011, I trained to be a facilitator of Byron Katie’s work. It deepened my understanding of inquiry and its power to undo knots of misperception in my being, and set me free from some of my belief systems. In the same year, I encountered Compassionate Nonviolent Communication (NVC), as created and taught by the late Marshall Rosenberg Ph.D., and it contributed enormously to helping make sense of how to be in relationship with others. It transformed the way I had been living and brought much enjoyment of, and connection with, the important people in my life. I have been training others in this work since 2013. In 2012, I was introduced to Focusing and was immediately drawn to what it offered. This skill has enabled me to find a new, friendlier relationship with my inner experience and developed my capacity to be courageous with what feels uncomfortable. In 2017, I became an Internationally Certified Trainer in NVC and an Internationally Certified Focusing Professional. I am currently also studying Hakomi Psychotherapy.